OCD Hope

Is mindfulness mediation or is meditation mindfulness?  Mindfulness is a type of meditation. When I was first trying to wrap my head around what is commonly mixed up I used the analogy of an automobile and body types. You can purchase a sedan, a coupe, a crossover, a truck, a van; all automobiles just a different structural layout. Although thankfully you don't have to purchase mediation, you can practice different types such as mindfulness, transcendental or Zazen (sitting).  Mindfulness meditation has received so much attention in the West because of the scientific study it has received. Scientific study has proven that mindfulness is very beneficial to one's mental and physical health and that it does change the brain in ways that benefit us; yes neuroplasticity is real.  So if you are practicing mindfulness you are meditating. Whether you choose to explain the nuances of your practice to someone that asks what you're doing is up to you.

If you have OCD, the question of 'what if?' pops up in your brain quite a bit. So often that we become unaware of the chatter it's creating in the background. The last post, 'The Other OCD', briefly mentioned some of the thoughts that people with OCD experience. The list is far from comprehensive. A common reaction to the intrusive thoughts (obsessions) mentioned in the previous post is, "what if I'm the exception and I'm really a bad person?", "what if I'm one of the few people that feels horrible about these thoughts but I don't really have OCD?", "what if I secretly like having the thoughts?", "what if I seek help and the therapist reports me to the police?"  An example of a very common intrusive thought is "what if I were to harm someone?". It's an intrusive thought that isn't an OCD thought, it's a human thought. All people, those with OCD and those without OCD, have intrusive...

OCD takes the morals that you most cherish, the things that define the fabric of who you are and turns them against you. Beyond the behaviours of compulsive hand washing and checking lies the other OCD that doesn't get talked about often. It's the OCD that shows little to no outward behavioural actions. It exists in the form of thoughts that have the ability to make your world seem like it's ending and that life isn't worth living. Many refer to it as Pure O because it displays no apparent compulsions; physical behaviours. The name Pure OCD, or Pure O as it's often referred to, can be very misleading because it suggests that it's 'only' obsessions. It must not be that scary, anxiety provoking, debilitating, or there's nothing that can be done about it because it lacks a compulsion. Nothing could be further from the truth. I live with this type of OCD. I'm not trying to minimize the suffering and hell that people with washing and check...

The mental act of checking to see if a thought or feeling still 'bothers' you is very common for everyone and becomes a compulsion for someone with OCD. The checking is done because you want it (thought or feeling) to go away and you want to feel good. Checking is a self-defeating and dangerous loop to get into.  Acceptance means that you are willing to be present with the thought or feeling regardless of whether it's pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. Checking is done because you're not willing to accept the presence of the thought or feeling.  Lack of acceptance means you are placing value on and energy towards the thought or feeling. Trying to make it go away only moves you further away from acceptance; also giving this otherwise meaningless thought or feeling energy. Your brain literally places great importance on the thought or feeling and the thought or feeling then becomes much more powerful than the other thought that you just had about wanting a cup o...

A thank you to the people that reintroduced me to mindfulness and continue to teach me and guide me. https://www.headspace.com/blog/view/220/ headspacer-stories

We are programmed to approach anxiety and fear in one of three ways.   One way is to try to ignore it ('it' refers to both anxiety and fear from this point forward in this post). Ignoring it may be done through distraction, whether that's always thinking about the future or the past so that you don't have to face what's presently going on in your life or numbing yourself from the present by watching lots of TV, playing on your phone all the time, spending too much time working, abusing alcohol or drugs; the list goes on but you get the idea.   Another way is to buy into it. We think about it by trying to reason and rationalize with it. We then apply logic and reasoning in an attempt to solve it or make it go away. We fool ourselves into thinking, 'if I just think about it one more time', or 'I haven't really thought about it long enough', or 'I have to solve it to find peace in my life'.  And yet another way is to to resist it...

I'm not a doctor or a psychologist, however my life experiences have helped me become quite an expert on treatment options for OCD.  I've been regularly seeing a therapist, albeit several different therapists over the years, since I was diagnosed with OCD 20 years ago. The treatment of OCD has come a long way since then but there's still tremendous room for improvement and the integration of mindfulness.   Let's get a better picture of what I'm talking about when I say treatment methods. Here's a list of what I've used over the last 20 years with various therapists: ERP (exposure response prevention), CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy), talk therapy (this is not a viable method of treating OCD so stay as far away from it as you can because it will only make your OCD worse), ACT (acceptance and commitment therapy), medication, and last but certainly not least, mindfulness. Exercise is not typically viewed as a treatment method but I swear by it. ...